


The One Where Sam Snaps

by HolyFuckingHell



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Blow Jobs, Dean Winchester Wears Castiel's Trenchcoat, Destiel - Freeform, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Sam Winchester Knows, Sam snaps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-20
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:29:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,174
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23746111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HolyFuckingHell/pseuds/HolyFuckingHell
Summary: Sam reads the Supernatural books by Chuck Shurley and discovers something about Castiel. Sam confronts Cas and Cas confesses. After this, Sam starts noticing a lot of little things and becomes fed up with Dean and his BS. Later, Sam calls Dean out about it.
Relationships: Castiel & Dean Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 4
Kudos: 157





	The One Where Sam Snaps

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like it!

Sam very grudgingly buys the supernatural books series to see what it’s all about. He gets back to the bunker in a relatively bad mood due to the money he just  _ willingly _ dropped on the set. Ever since he first heard about them, he had been curious about what they actually said, how much information about himself was out in the world for people to know, things like that.

He never really got around to reading all of them, but this whole month has been pretty slow. Cas is gone a lot with business in Heaven, Dean is held up in his room doing god-knows-what, and Sam… he’d been reading.  _ A lot. _ He would do other things too, like clean, cook, watch TV, but mostly he had been reading. Mostly what he’d been reading were old books, for research purposes. This, he guesses, is research too... A little bit. 

The first couple of books he reads are pretty drab in his opinion. He doesn’t get the plot twists or any of the shock factors that other,  _ normal _ readers get because he already lived it. Upon reading the books, he is delighted with how he and Dean are portrayed but  _ horrified _ to know that Chuck even wrote down what they were thinking. Even if at the time they didn’t say those things, those things were in the books. Their private (or at least they thought they were private) thoughts were written on the page for anyone to see. 

That, among other things, was very disturbing to Sam. From what he had read through, everything the book said he thought was accurate, meaning everything else the people in the book were thinking was also accurate. 

It was weird reading about his own life experiences, but Sam found that he liked the books much more once Cas was introduced. This is when Sam started to learn things that he didn’t really know before. Things like Bobby was actually the first one to trust him, even though he thought Cas was quote, “A nutball.” He saved Dean from Hell after all, so Sam guesses that was good enough for Bobby. 

Sam continues reading book after book going through year after year of their lives. It was kind of cool, Sam thought, kind of like a scrapbook, but Sam would never admit that he didn’t have anything but pure hatred for the books to anyone other than himself. 

He starts reading a particular part of the book which is under the chapter called “Free to be You and Me,” and it makes Sam start to wonder. This was the time that Sam and Dean weren’t hunting together and it makes him upset that he has to relive that, but he finds out about what Dean did when he wasn’t with him, therefore Sam didn’t really know about it. Dean isn’t much of a sharer. 

That chapter is odd. To say the least. After hours of reading, Sam decides to call it a day and go to sleep. The next morning, he picks the book back up again and reads on. And on. And on. And on. And on. He gets onto the last book that Chuck has published. Sam knows that Chuck will be publishing more and that he can’t really stop him. But he gets close to the end. He finds himself reading faster. And faster. And faster. He reads one particular line that he isn’t quite sure he read right. 

No, he definitely read that wrong. He reads it again. Wait, he must have interpreted it the wrong way. Quickly, he reads it again. And again. And again and again- he slams the book shut and throws it onto the table. He stands up off the chair and takes a step back. “Woah,” Sam says to himself.

He pushes the hair off his face and back nervously. “Whaaaaattt…” Sam whispers softly and slowly, really dragging it out. He stares at the unfinished, closed book on the table, not knowing what to do. 

He doesn’t know how long he is standing there, but it feels like a while. A little later, Dean comes prancing into the room with a beer in his hand, smiling a bit. “Hey,” he says cheerfully.

Sam snaps out of his trance the best he can to reply with “Hey.”

“What are you reading?” Dean sits down across the table. Sam sits back down too. Dean picks up the book and looks at the cover, “Supernatural: by Chuck Shurley. Dude, really?” Dean tosses the book back down on the table.

“Yeah…” Sam mumbles, “I was curious to see if anything in there was new or interesting.”

“And?”

“Nope. No, nothing, nuh. Not uhh, not worth the read,” Sam babbles, pulling the book away from Dean’s reach.

Dean shrugs and nods, taking a sip of his beer. “Cas is coming back today!” Dean offers up.

“Oh cool… and you’re… happy about that, right?” Sam asks awkwardly.

Dean makes a weird face at him. “Uh, yes?” Dean answers confused.

Sam nods, “Why is he coming back, just because?”

“Well, don’t you think it’s time that he comes back? He’s been gone for a while.”

Sam thinks. He has been gone for a while. And in that while, Dean locked himself in his room. Maybe he doesn’t know what to do or how to function if he doesn’t have a case to work on or Cas. Or maybe Sam is reading too much into this. Damn those books. “Yeah, you’re right,” Sam finally answers.

“Yeah, but he does think he has a case about a demon in Lockheart, so we might go do that. It’s only an hour away so…” 

“Oh so he does have a reason to come back then,” Sam says.

Dean squints at Sam. If a stare was ever going to light him on fire, Sam thinks it would be this stare right here. He knows he fucked up.

“ _ We’re _ the reason he’s coming back,” Dean grumbles angrily. He stares at Sam for a long time where neither of them says anything. Eventually, after another sip of his beer, Dean says a bit more calmly, “He just has this case because he knows it’s what we do.”

Sam nods, “You’re right.” He backs off.

“Okay…” Dean says wrapping up, “I’m going to make something to eat, do you want some?” He stands up. 

“What are you making?”

“Don’t know yet, do you what some or not?”

“Sure,” Sam answers like a question. Dean nods and heads out of the library and towards the kitchen. Dean usually makes pretty decent dinners so Sam obviously says yes.

Once Dean is gone completely, Sam opens the book back to the page he was last at. He reads the line again once or twice before shutting it. 

He needs to talk to Cas. 

A few 10 minutes later, Castiel comes walking quietly down the stairs. Sam hears the big heavy door shut and walks out of the kitchen. Sam followed Dean to the kitchen, after finally shutting the book, to keep him company making whatever Dean decided to make. Dean stayed in the kitchen instead of meeting Cas at the door because he was cooking and could exactly step away. 

“Hello, Sam. Where’s Dean?”

Sam is used to Cas asking this. It’s almost habitual. Anytime Cas sees Sam and not Dean, it’s the first question he asks. “He’s uh, making dinner. He’s in the kitchen.”

“Ohh,” Cas says, walking towards the kitchen.

Sam grabs his shoulder as he tries to pass by, “Wait, Cas. I need to talk to you real quick. 

Cas turns around. “Alright…” Cas says confused at Sam’s odd urgency in this situation. 

“I wanted to ask you-”

“Can you please let go of my shoulder?” Cas interrupts. Sam looks down and sees that he, in fact, has not let Cas go. He drops his hand.

“Sorry,” Sam apologizes. “I wanted to ask you about the supernatural books that Chuck has been writing, have you read them?”

“Oh,” Cas’s face relaxes a bit, “I have. I liked them a lot, I found them interesting.”

“Okay, cause I bought them and-”

“You bought them?” Cas says seriously. His eyebrows go up and he looks suddenly uncomfortable.

“Yes and I-”

“Did you read them?” Cas says harshly and panicked.

“Yeah but I-”

“How far did you get? Did you finish reading them?” Cas interrupts once again.

“I’m almost done with book 10.”

“Oh no,” Cas says quickly, turning around to look away from Sam. Sam hasn’t seen him this upset in a very long time. Cas hardly ever loses his composure so this is odd to see.

“So you know already?” Sam asks.

“Yes, I know. Of course I know.” Cas sighs and turns around, “I suppose now you have questions.”

Sam stares for a second at Cas for a second. “Is it true?” Cas doesn’t answer for a few  _ long _ seconds but then nods. “So you have a crush on Dean?” Sam whispers very quietly so there is virtually no way Dean can hear.

“I’ve found that these emotions are very complicated, but that people may put a label like ‘crush’ on it, so yes. I have a crush on Dean,” Cas surrenders, looking to the floor again.

“And he doesn’t know?” Sam asks.

“No. And you are not going to tell him. No one is going to tell him.”

“Who else knows?”

“Everyone who has read the books! And I thought Dean would never read those books, and if he did, he wouldn’t read that far. Definitely not to the part in book 10! Charlie once asked me about it, she reads them. Gabriel and Balthazar also knew. I don’t know how they knew, but they knew. And Uriel knew before  _ I _ was even aware.” Cas sighs deeply. “Do not tell him anything, please.”

“I won’t,” Sam promises. 

“Good,” Cas says, “Uriel told him, Gabriel told him, and Balthazar told him. Dean only thought they were joking.”

Sam nods, he already knew that part. “Cas, what are you going to do?”

“Charlie asked me that same question,” Cas steps closer to Sam, “I will do nothing.”

“But maybe-”

“No,” Cas rolls his eyes. “I will do…  _ nothing.” _ He gestures with his hand, putting emphasis on the ‘nothing.’

“Uhh, guys? Everything alright out there?” Dean shouts from the kitchen. 

“Yes!” Cas shouts back, looking at Sam a bit angrily. “Let’s go, Sam.” They both walk back to the kitchen. 

“Cas!” Dean shouts as they walk in, “Been a while!”

Sam sits at the small table across from Cas. “I suppose it has,” Cas says.

“You suppose?” Dean questions, turning around with two plates of food. 

“Your definition and my definition of ‘a while’ are very different, but that may be because I am extremely old,” Cas says matter of factly. 

Dean sets his plate down, and the other plate in front of Sam. Dean smiles because what Cas just said was so extremely  _ Cas. _ Dean sits down next to him.

The boys start eating and Cas tells them all the information he has on the case in Lockheart. 

“So we go tomorrow afternoon then. We know what the demon does, when he does it, and where he’s gonna be, so I think we got the easy part!” Dean says smiling. 

“Well, there are two demons, but yes.”

“Two… okay,” Dean nods, “We’ve handled worse,” Dean says looking at Sam.

“Okay, tomorrow afternoon it is then,” Sam confirms.  _ Why is it that it’s always at night?  _ Sam thinks to himself.  _ It’s always at night. _

The following night, the boys find themselves searching for a cabin in the woods, late at night. Cas and Sam both have flashlights, while Dean remains ready with a gun. Naturally, Sam has one too, but not as ready as Dean has his. They have been walking around for a long time, talking about their lives like they aren’t about to kill two demons in the middle of the night. Like what they’re doing is normal. Like their lives are normal. They walk farther into the woods, “It should be close,” Cas says.

“Good,” Dean groans, “I’m freezing!” Sam will admit that it’s cold, but he isn’t  _ freezing _ . He looks over at Dean who does look very cold. 

“I guess it is kind of cold, but I wouldn’t say freezing,” Sam mocks him.

“It’s friggin cold, dude. I’m friggin cold.” Dean lets out a breath and is a tiny bit mesmerized with how it looks in the light of the flashlight at night.  _ Pretty damn cold if he can see it. _ Dean thinks.

Cas stops and starts shaking off his trench coat. “Here you can wear my coat,” He says to Dean.

Everyone stops walking. “Um, thanks but… I’m good,” Dean says rolling his eyes.

“Aren’t you cold?” Cas asks. “I will not get cold, I don’t need it, you can take it.”

“Yeah but-”

“Here,” Cas holds his coat out for Dean to take. “It is quite warm. I think it will help.”

“Cas,” Dean chuckles awkwardly, “I’m not wearing your jacket, man.”

“Why not?” Cas questions. 

“Because that’s- we’re not- I’m not gonna just-” Dean babbles making Sam snicker a little, but he hides it well. A wind blows long and hard and makes Dean rethink his answer. Dean looks at Sam who is smiling. He gives Sam a dirty look. “Fine,” Dean says, taking the coat from him. 

Dean starts putting it on, “In my experience, this is the part where we go back to your place and make out. Definitely second base,” Dean adjusts the jacket that is now on, “Maybe third.”

Cas looks at him confused,  _ he doesn’t have a ‘place.’ Why would Dean want to play baseball right now? _ Dean looks back at Cas with a childish half-grin. 

Sam is the first to start walking again, “Ugh!” Sam grunts, “You always do this!” Cas and Dean follow him.

“I always do what?” Dean says defensively.

Sam, now that he’s thinking about it and that he’s relived all of their interactions for the past ten years, is a little fed up. Especially now knowing that Cas has feelings for Dean. It just seems mean to say things like that. It feels wrong to laugh, too. “You say something sexually suggestive to Cas and then play it off!”

“What are you talking about?” Dean says baffled. Cas is staring at Sam, wishing, hoping, willing him not to say anything to Dean. Just let it go. 

Unfortunately, he doesn’t, “Don’t act like you don’t know, Dean, you child!”

“You’re a child!” Dean shouts back at Sam. 

_ They both sound like children _ , Cas thinks. “You two are being too loud,” Cas says. Sam and Dean quiet down. “That light over there is it.” Cas gestures over and they see a faint light which is the cabin the demons are at. 

They wind up back at the bunker at around 2 in the morning. They finished their job relatively quickly and effortlessly without any real hitches. As easy as ganking two demons can be. They walk into the bunker.

“You still have on Cas’s trenchcoat,” Sam says.

Dean didn’t even notice that he still had it on, but it reminds Dean of something. “Sorry,” Dean says, taking it off quickly and handing it back to Cas.

“It is alright, I didn’t mind,” Cas says, taking it from him. His jacket is warm and now kind of smells like Dean, but Cas doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know whether he should put it back on right away or not, he tries to do the thing he thinks is least weird as to not raise any suspicion. Cas walks into the other room nervously to put it back on without being judged.

Cas walking away makes it the perfect time for Dean to confront Sam. “Sam, question,” Dean says commandingly, “What were you talking about earlier?”

“Earlier when?” Sam asks.

“Earlier when Cas handed me his... You know… then.”

“Ohh,” Sam says, “You mean earlier when I called you out on being a mean-fucking-tease?” Sam sasses. Sam cusses more the later it gets, something Dean knows, but never asks about because he thinks it’s rather funny. 

“Yeah,” Dean says sharply, “What was that?”

“You just say a lot of things to Cas like you want you and him to be together is all,” Sam informs.

Dean looks at Sam with a bewildered look on his face, “Name one time.” 

Sam can name a few times. More than a few times. He was just reminded about all those times when he read the books. “One of the very first things you said to Cas was ‘how you have the same problem with women’ right after he said the thing about how it took him awhile to find a strong enough vessel,” Sam continues, “Oh hi,” Sam mocks in a crude interpretation of Dean’s voice, “I’m Dean, I have a big penis!”

“Oh my god, Sam!” Dean says like an old lady who can’t believe that they would show someone kissing on television, “Stop. I was joking about that. It just came out! How do you even know about that?” Dean asks.

“Uh, Cas told me,” Sam lies.

“That doesn’t count.”

“Oh, it doesn’t count, I’ll name another one,” Dean raises an eyebrow at Sam, “When we had to lock you in Bobby’s safe room because you were being stupid and irrational and you looked right at Cas and said, ‘not for nothing,’” Sam uses his mocking-Dean voice again, “‘last person to look at me like that, I got laid.’ Dean who even says that?!”

Dean looks at him speechlessly as he remembers saying that to Cas one day, “Dean, that was the most blatant invitation for sex I’ve ever heard. And, you shouldn’t do that anymore because it’s unfair to Cas. 

“It’s unfair to Cas,” Dean says calmly, “Why would it be unfair to Cas?”

“Nevermind,” Sam says, “There are more, but I’m not gonna name them.”

“Good, I don’t want to hear them,” Dean says rolling his eyes and turning away. This conversation got heated way faster than Dean thought it would, he doesn’t understand why Sam cares so much. Maybe he’s finally fed up. 

“Wait, Dean,” Sam says, calming back down, “I know you are a flirty person, but seriously, why do you do that?” Sam chuckles a little bit.

Dean awkwardly laughs, “Sam, I have to tell you something.”

“What?” Sam asks, genuinely curious. 

“I…” Dean contemplates telling Sam. He’s already started, might as well full send into this, but he’s never really been a feelings guy. “I like Cas,” Dean mumbles, “That’s why.”

“You what?” Sam asks rhetorically. “Oh my gosh of course you do!”

Dean makes a dissatisfied face at Sam, “Fuck you, Sam.”

“Why are you telling me this?” Sam asks chuckling again, this time because it’s just now clicking how  _ stupid _ Dean and Cas are.

“Help me!” Dean says, scrambling, “I don’t know what to do!”

“Just. Tell. Him.” Sam chants at Dean flailing his arms around. 

“What, just walk up to him and go ‘Hey buddy! You give me butterflies, let’s bang!”

Sam laughs again, “Dean, what the hell! No!” Sam waits a little until he stops laughing, “He gives you butterflies?” Dean looks at him, absolutely pissed. “Okay, okay,” Sam wraps up, thinking of a plan, “When you two are hanging out- don’t look at me like that, I know you guys hang out together when I’m not around! -When you two are hanging out together, tell him that you appreciate him and then make a move.  _ Don’t--  _ Don’t be gross. I mean like,” Sam shivers, “Kiss him or something.” Dean nods, “ _ KISS.  _ Not  _ grope,  _ Dean, he won’t like that. Do not grope him, you little nasty.”

Dean looks at Sam weirdly, “You think that will work?” 

Sam laughs again, walking away, “Dean, I would bet my soul that that will work. Now good night! It’s too late for me to deal with this shit anyway,” He grumbles as he walks. 

Dean takes a deep breath. He doesn’t have to do this tonight… He’s been putting it off for a few years now, he can wait another night. What’s one more night? Dean starts shaking slightly from nerves. Maybe he will go talk to Cas a little, then go to sleep. He doesn’t have to mention anything, he just has to go talk to him. 

Dean goes to find Cas. Most nights he spends in the bunker, he spends in the library, so Dean checks there first. Sure enough, Cas is sitting there reading some old, leather-bound book. 

“Hey Cas,” Dean says to get his attention.

“Hello Dean,” Cas looks up, “I thought you went to sleep.” 

“No, I’m not really tired yet, I slept in late today, so… yeah.” Cas nods. Dean realizes that he’s being fidgety and weird and not like himself at all. “Thanks for letting me wear your coat today. You were right, it is warm.”  _ It is warm,  _ Dean thinks,  _ he sounds like an idiot. _

“Of course, Dean. Whatever you need,” Cas briefly smiles. 

Dean stands there awkwardly for a moment, not saying anything. “I looked good in it didn’t I?”  _ Okay, why’d he say  _ that?  _ He seriously needs to stop saying things like that. _

“I suppose you did, Dean,” Cas agrees.

More awkward staring and silence goes by. “Do you maybe want to watch a movie with me, Cas?”  _ Okay, movie is good, movie is good. _

“Okay, but it’s 2 AM, you know that, right Dean?” Dean nods, “Okay,” Cas gets up, “What movie?”

Dean honestly did think he’d get this far. He didn’t plan this all the way through. “The Hateful Eight!” He shouts, that being the first movie to pop in his head. Dean starts walking towards his room with Cas in tow. 

They walk into the room and Dean walks over to the TV to put the DVD in. Cas walks over to the chair by the desk, putting it by the bed and facing it towards the TV. Every time they watch movies together, Cas always sits there and Dean always sits on his bed. 

Dean gets the movie going and sits on his bed, leaning his back against the headboard. “Cas… you can sit with me on my bed if… ya know, if you want to.”

“Uh,” Cas stutters, “Alright,” He gets up and sits next to Dean, leaning against the headboard also, “You have never asked me to sit on your bed with you before, Dean.”

“You never asked if you could sit on my bed with me before, Cas”

“I suppose you are right,” Cas adds.

The very long pre-credits starts rolling on the screen. “Cas, I just want you to know that I like when you join us on hunts… And I like having you here.”  _ Guess he’s doing this now. Maybe. If it works. _ “So I guess what I’m saying is thank you.”

“I also enjoy being here,” Cas says, turning to look Dean in the eyes. The extra-long opening scene starts playing now, still flipping through credits. 

“You do?” Dean asks.

“Yes, I feel very at home here with you.”

Dean may be overthinking this, but with  _ him? Specifically? _ Dean leans in a little closer to Cas, “Hey Cas?” Cas leans in a little bit too. “I uhm-” Dean leans the rest of the way slowly to meet Cas’s lips. Cas is a little shocked at first, but he adjusts quickly, cupping Dean’s face gently with his hand. 

Dean pulls away from their tender kiss and smiles brightly. “Why did you stop?” Cas asks curiously.

Dean jumps off the bed, “To turn off Kurt Russel before it gets weird.” Dean switches the TV off then crawls back on the bed, straddling Cas as they begin to kiss again. This time more urgently. 

The next morning, Dean and Cas don’t get up until late. They walk out and meet Sam. Sam looks from Dean to Cas. Back and forth. Dean and Cas both look back at Sam confused at his odd stares.

“What happened?” Sam demands.

“Uh,” Dean starts, “Cas gave me his coat, then we went back to my place.” Cas smiles innocently. “Then I got to third base,” Dean adds quickly. He can’t help but to proudly admit that, it being maybe one of the best, if not  _ the _ best blow jobs of his life. “It was awesome.” 

Sam groans, hoping Dean will stop.

“I mean, he licked  _ everywhere-” _

“Dean!” Cas scolds. 

“What?” Dean defends.

“Stop. Talking. Too much information!” Sam shouts at them before they disappear into the other room. 

Dean leans towards Cas as the two walk away. “Maybe later you can get to fifth base! Or now,” Dean suggests, “Now works too!”

“Dean, there are only four bases in the game of baseball.”

“While that is true, I’m saying we should fuck.”

“Dean!” Cas scolds again. 

“What?” Cas rolls his eyes and starts kissing Dean again. 


End file.
